I, and hopefully many others right now, am self-quarantining and social distancing amid the COVID-19 pandemic.
Is it inconvenient? Yes. Could things be worse? Definitely yes. This is not the end of the world, and I know it. But for people like me with mental illnesses, this is going to be especially hard. Here's why.
As someone with anxiety -- and a little sprinkle of depression -- I am prone to overthinking, being clingy (anyone who remembers High School Sarah asking: "Will you come to the bathroom with me :( ?"), and panic. While self-isolation is something my mental illnesses provoke from time to time, those are more harmful kinds of isolation -- times where I do not reply to my very closest loved ones for hours, times where I lay in bed and waste away procrastinating and then panicking about that procrastination in ways that lead to further procrastination. Those of us living alone or away from home may find themselves feeling especially lonely. This is the concern that people like me are facing during COVID-19: that we will turn to harmful forms of self-isolation.
I can remember summers in years past when I was without a job (which is, admittedly, a sign of my privilege), and without a mode of transportation, and I would spend days, weeks at a time locked up in my house. As I live in a district that is far from sources of entertainment, and as my country does not have the best infrastructure for cyclists and walkers, I was entirely reliant on other people's help to leave my house. What I remember is how often I felt deflated, and useless. I remember how often I would cry for no reason. I remember feeling very dark and afraid of those summers, and afraid of myself.
For some students, this is an especially difficult time. Without those regular classes, without meeting with our instructors and other classmates, and without the need for a regular sleep schedule, it is easy for that self-discipline to slip away. Suddenly, we are being asked to maintain our responsibilities without any of the same incentives or encouragement to do so.
Another population that the virus affects is domestic abuse survivors. Now that people are forced to work from home, and in many cases are being laid off, this means abusive partners may have even more control over survivor's finances and access even remote socialization. One article I read suggests those who can should "keep important documents handy, know the address of your nearest precinct, have some money on hand (if you have access to money) for calling an Uber, keep a phone on hand, and know which friend or family member’s house you can go to if a shelter is unable to accept you". For those of us who know or suspect someone we know is subject to abuse, we can do our best by trying to relocate or help finance them.
Yes, this is going to be hard. It is on us to do what we can to help ourselves and to protect others, too.
social distancing does not mean anti-socialization
Now more than ever, we need to stay social. Just, in a different way.
I have already set up Skype calls with my friend groups and family members. Meaning I have arranged and penciled them in like real events. This is purposeful.
Your weekly planner may not be full of fun dinners and happy hours right now, but you can set aside time to video call your loved ones, to share a meal between screens, or to watch a film together virtually. (My boyfriend and I are planning to try an extension like Netflix Party to watch films together, but if you have any suggestions, leave a comment below!) Setting aside intentional e-meet-ups is going to help us feel like we are still meaningful members of society--because we still are.
give yourself a modified routine
I am not leaving my current safe house to go anywhere or do anything, but what did I do when I woke up this morning? I stretched, put on two cups of coffee, washed my face, got dressed, did my make up, and made some breakfast. In other words: I did exactly what I would normally do.
I think this is key whether you are a student, have a mental illness, or if you are someone who now has to work from home. I mean, you might be all three of things because, well, that's life. Things are definitely different from the way they were before, and we no longer have the same freedom of choice with where we can go, but if we start discarding our entire routines because of COVID-19, we are not going to get through this very well.
trick yourself into being productive with your wardrobe
Right now, I am wearing high-waisted denim jeans, a stretchy tube top, and fuzzy slides. I would only leave my house in two out of three of these items, but that is beside the point.
The point is that when you are wearing "real people clothes", you force yourself to keep up with your daily tasks because you are dressed in something you would normally wear if you were heading off to a class, a job, or running an errand. Freelancers and other professionals that regularly work from home may already know this trick because they are used to minimizing any distractions that blur the lines between work life and home life. We should be doing the same right now.
This does not mean wearing slacks, or loafers, or big funky balloon sleeves. (Unless, of course, slacks and big funky balloon sleeves make you a more productive person whether you are sitting at a cubicle or a make-shift dining-table-desk.) It just means putting together an outfit that is marginally uncomfortable enough to prevent you from crawling back into bed and procrastinating with animal videos from The Dodo Twitter account.
give yourself something fun to do
Now is as good a time as ever for us to do those things we never have time for.
If you like cooking or baking, see if there's a new recipe your current pantry and fridge can accommodate, or plan to pick up certain ingredients on your next essential grocery outing. If you don't like cooking or baking, maybe all this ample time on your hands will you give a buffer to get things wrong, and then get things right.
Maybe you used to be a Duolingo superstar before life got in the way of you and your three-week streak. Go back to learning that language for that trip you've been planning all your life. (And yes, I included this example because my notifications are on for the app, and yes I have been bullied into relearning Spanish and French because Duolingo has joined every other e-commerce brand in manipulating the isolation of COVID-19 to boost their sales and engagement. Yes, their notification was a pro-academic guilt trip from a condescending green owl. I don't want to talk about it.)
Any kind of hobby or skill you have been meaning to pick up or polish off, consider doing so now. Start doing yoga during your productivity breaks, go back to your old watercolor kit, and take a moment to finally try poaching an egg in water.
social distancing does not mean you cannot ever leave your home
Our reactions to the virus so far occupy two extremes. Some of us are buying up all the toilet paper and canned goods possible in preparation for a hybrid hurricane-zombie-apocalypse, and some of us are completely ignoring medical professionals by giving out false information about the virus or continuing our Spring Break plans as usual. Neither of these responses is safe to pursue. Neither of them is sustainable.
If you are a person that has not been diagnosed with COVID-19 and are not a population who is at higher risk of contracting and suffering from the virus -- meaning, you are not 65 years or older, and you are not a person of any age with pre-existing conditions -- there are perfectly acceptable ways for you to leave your house. As long as you continue to practice social distancing.
You can go for a run or a brisk walk in your neighborhood. You can go to the grocery store or the pharmacy to pick up some items you ran out of recently. You can chill out in your back yard if you have one.
You can do all of these things, so long as you:
Stay six feet away from other individuals
Do not entertain parties of larger than ten people at once
Do not lean in when having to converse with another individual, like a store clerk
Do not make physical contact with other individuals
Use other appendages like your knuckles, shoulders, feet, and back to enter codes, open doors, and anything else that involves potentially risky surfaces, and
Routinely wash and sanitize your hands after going out in public and touching public surfaces
Social distancing is not about complete and total never-ending isolation from the outside world. It is about smart, safe practices that ensure you and no one you encounter will be infected by the virus by careless germ swapping and prolonged physical interaction. If you have heard doctors talk about "flattening the curve" recently, this is what they mean. They mean limiting the number of people being infected at one time so that our healthcare systems will not be overwhelmed. It means only leaving the house to go to public spaces when it is absolutely necessary, and keeping your distance from others when you are outside.
This is really a message I send to people who are going through what I am going through and who are worried they may begin spiraling because of COVID-19. This is a message I am sending to those who feel they have previously isolated themselves from their support groups, who need a reminder that now is the time to pick up the phone. This is the time to take care of yourself, in every way possible. It is going to be okay.
It is going to be okay.
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